honestly, i have always been..

..afraid when i am so profoundly happy. happiness like this is frightening. they only let you be this happy if they are preparing to take something away from you. u gain some, and u loose some. thats life.

reverse saikologi

hey, hmm.. i dont noe how to do d pembukaan of this post, so..hmm, I HAVE MANY MANY MANY FLAWS IN ME YG MAYB SOME OF U R TOO BLIND TO SEE OR NOTICE. sb x ckp or mention, mayb .. it looks like i ni seorang yg bukan main lg. n bdw, i turn the flaws down by looking on a brighter and greener side. sb tu i x banyak bising pasal d kekurangans i have. THAT IS MY REASON. i was raised up taught doing that. so then, il always be thankful to god n sedar diri. tapi since u x puas hati dengan sikap i yang i x suka merungut pasal kekurangan i, so now.. im sharing my flaws with the public.


when i dont do good grades for my studies - i think of those yang sampai kena buang uni. so i bersyukur.

when i give up my life n just nak berhenti everyting especialy blja - i pk, org lain sampai berhutang/ work night shifts/ kerja sambil blaja.. so then will be educated n respected person. so i get up ( xd la bgn betui ) n change my thought n again be thankful.

wen i rasa muka i ni buruk - i pk of those yg x cukup sifat. i bersyukur, nasib baik muka buruk, kalau cacat?

wen i pk myvi byk pakai petrol, n nak bigger n lg sempoi car - i pk, hey, org lain.. bejalan kaki tgh panas p mana2, besyukur sket. n sedar diri - hang tu x mmpu, mak bapak dh bg kreta syukur sket apa yg ada.

wen im so fedup with my realtionship - i pk, mayb i did sumthing to others thats y my rltnship pun terumbang ambing.

bila i nak beg, i x dpt - i pk, org lain x betukar pon beg depa. bersyukur sama noh

bila i nak shoes i x dpt - org lain x pakai kasut pon mintak sedekah

bila i nak clothes i x dpt - i pk, org lain xd baju pon nak tukar tiap2 hari.

bila i bising makanan x sdp - org lain xd makanan pon nak makan, starve to death pon ada. so im back to being thankful

wenever ada gadget baru n i nak n x dpt - i pk, org lain xda pun. + d money kalau sedekah, berkat lagi dari asyik bli bru bli bru ja. SEBAB MATA ORANG KATA KITA RIAK, BUKAN DEPA NAK PK KITA MAMPU DSBBKAN REZEKI TUHAN BAGI.

bila i asyik sakit dada n cant breathe - i pk, alhamdulilah.. bru skit sakit i ni, org lain sampai kena admit hosp, yg meninggal pon ada. so im given chance to do better in life.

my deaf-ness. kekadang x dgr, kkdg dengar, sll sll buat buat x dgr - lg baik x dgr dr dgr, sb mata yg melihat.. baca benda yg skt hati pon rasa mcm better off dying.

when i xd duit - i pk people who r in poverty.

bila i nak attention fr bf - i pk, some people, parents pon xd.

bila i pk, y m so thin n senang rs sejuk - i pk, org lain are frozen.

when i think of i just want to die - they r people who wud just do anything to live.

when i xtau guna someting - i pk ada org buta huruf. so xpala . small matter.

wen i dont have much frens - i have a lot. i just dont realy melepak. i dont. id rather stay home than loaf around.



ni kekurangan yg i can think of right now. i dont noe if its kekurangan for U, but it is for me. n its a big deal. dif people have dif perception. all in all, i thankful for everything.. kurang atau lebih, ni semua rezeki tuhan n nikmat dunia yg i dapat. its a test for me. i sedar benda ni sementara n sll pk pasal when all these are going to be taken away from me. I TAKOT SGT. (mintak simpang malaikat 44, mintak ampun semua dosa, jgn lah tarik nikmat ni semua. mira berayukur sangat).so u jgnla ingat i ni pk i perfect. no. u dont noe, if i cry myself to sleep. u dont noe if im suffering heartache every now n then n frequently. mayb i talk about doing good ja, n yes.. i am no angel. i buat benda x elok jugak. but i x kacau hidup org. i do them to myself. i cause damage to myself. I NOE AND I AM AWARE THAT I X BUAT ORANG. I DONT TRASH PEOPLE. I DONT. I MENGUMPAT, YES. BUT I TAK TRASH PEOPLE PUBLICLY OR TALK ABOUT THE GODDES IN ME MATERIALY N FIZIKALY. NO. I DONT. mayb u think i boast, i x. i just share with those yg im close with sb ssh nak contact. N PS: HOW DO I KACAU ORG, WHEN I KAWAN PUN XDAK?

n i rasa - kat blog ni, org baca .. so, its better off sharing good things than bad ones. sbb sapa nak tau benda yg x elok jadi kat u? org nak hapy hapy. kalau sakit mata n hati baca benda hapy. stop reading n care. its the best alternative.

i miss u i miss u i miss u i miss u
i miss u i miss u i miss u i miss u
i miss u
i miss u i miss u i miss u i miss u
i miss u i miss u i miss u i miss u
i miss u
i miss u
i miss u
i miss u
i miss u

the rempit in me

my boyfriend and aliaas boyfriend :)

lyssa williams jgn marah :)

my private conversation

M : M makan hati tau dgn A. ( dgn suara yg penuh sayu n heartbroken )

A : M, jgn la makan hati..

( i got so touched n wanted to cry when he sed that. sb mcm, awwww :) then..)

.. telan hati sudah la.

( sakit hati, bengang gila. jerit MELUAT! and hung up ) .. ( lepas hang up, gelak smb cry under the pillow ).




sad sad love story. sabar ye dik, sabar.

echo - trapt

its a good day today , n im supost to be studying for my paper on monday, but i dgn senang lenangnya am watching FRIENDS and surfing the net for nothing. wasted a whole day yesterday in ipoh doing dont noe wat. n i woke up sangat late tday n yesterday.

the internet is like CELAKA so i sangat xmau on9 n blog. s.i is not just a hutan but THE HUTAN. the coverage makes me go GOD DAMN!

i selalu beli qutex, but qutex are one of my pakai buang buang items. really. il buy them, wear them once n then i bagi org, my sis or my cousins or frens. depending on sapa dekat with the kepentingan.

n bila nak dkt fotoshoot ja, asal ada fotoshoot ja, them BAMM! the zits pun timbul.

its harder for me to say THANK YOU to the ones I LOVE, than saying SORRY. really. tapi kalau kekawan tu senang la nak ucap tq n sory. kalau org i sayang, mmg sgt susah nak dengar i cakap both words. tapi, the word thank u is even susah nak dengar dari sory. realy. i dont noe y.

OWH YOU! y dont u brag and boast anymore? i tot ure living in this very perfect world of urs ( which i n some others noe x wujud pon) yang undefeatable by anyone? ure making me bored lah. i x umpat u, just like to read n LOL.

i feel that women face menopause while men face mid life crisis. TRUE.

umm.. n i am not ur friend. i mean, i am ur friend but not that gila close to u, that u can burp and fart in front of me. or even talk about it. PLEASE HAVE SOME MANNERS. they are things that u can talk with me and there are things u cant. except for that weve known each other from under the skin, then fine. like me and aliaa or megat or farhana or dhiya2.

please note that, i dont joke with my frens, only with my closed ones. i mean a serius joke. that is me. and i am me.

TAHNIAH FOR THE AIS PAPER, sb soalan spot x kluar. haihhhh.

should we believe in luck or not? or mayb the luck is just d suplement in wtv were geting?

the simple remedy of an arguement is basically and usually by just saying SORRY n i totaly hate it. but its true.

im spending rm20 perday just for food that includes my breakfast, lunch, dinner n supper. tu minimum. im gona go bankrupt sb makan ja. x masuk minyak lg. PLUS, i kan pengangkutan awam.

I NEED A BIGGER ROOM. or mayb i shud move out? HAH! not ever gn happen. paling jauh il move is to my grandmas place which is like 5 mins away from my place. kalau lebih dari 5 min tu, sah komfirm i stop kat KAYU beli makan,

i got my AZAMS for this semester break.

after years of thinking, i finally found some thing that i can do as a hobby. mayb taking pictures? i wn try that n see how it goes. i wn ask for the dslr camera, but i think its too much to ask sb, i dont ned it as i have camera dah. n ada like 4 cameras at home. i have my own videocam, n i x guna pon. so if i ask for it, mcm melampau ja? + how am i gn cary the camera? its heavy n bulky. im not gn spoil my bag just to put the camera inside? hmm... ok. not gn ask for it. ( for the time being. but umm.. yeah. tak kot?. xtau?. kalau ask pon i bagi my brother la. he deserves it more )

i dont check on my post . i trus publish sb tu ada spelling mistakes, ayat tunggang tebalik. , n . ntah kat mana2. n yeah, even wen i speak, i ckp terbalik sumtimes. so wen i post sumthing, my mouth wil speak n fingers will taip. so tu yg post i kekadang susah difahami kerana bahasa i lain sket. tebalik sana tebalik sini.

its raining cats and dogs here. i gn go sleep. TADAAAAA


OK FINE! IM GEDIK NOW, I WANT THE CAMERA.

beybehhh..

I JUST WANT TO SIT IN BED AND SNUGGLE AND EAT POPCORN, AND WATCH STUPID MOVIES WITH YOU ALL DAY LONG :)

jealousy

mental uneasiness from suspicion or fear of rivalry, unfaithfulness, etc., as in love or aims.

quoting a fren of mine. heard n laughed hard.

ITS A BEAUTIFUL DAY TODAY, NOW WATCH SOME BITCH FUCK IT UP

ya lah, semua orang pun :)

please please please

CAN I PRETTY PLEASE HAVE ALL OF THE ABOVE, PLEASE ? hmm :/

alololololo

cute nyaaaaaaaaaa .

for u, yes for u :)

roses r red,

violets r blue,

i have 5 fingers,

the middle one's for YOU.

NOW I CAN DIE :)

THE ITS ULTIMATUMS ( two of ) . yes yes yes! christmas ( birthday ) came early dis year, was expecting them end of may/ early june. but alhamdulilah stil :) sory gambar x clear , sb mama dok ketok pintu mcm gila suro dhiya2 siap nak balik mahligai dia. hmm..

wah wah wahhhhhhh gembire tak terkate :)

( malu bilik semak, serius! )

love

if TAJ MAHAL is The Shah Jehan's simbol of love , then.. KLIA is mine. ( jgn slh sangka, i x penah bercinta with DR. M, if yes pun.. i suka jugak [: ) really. saya sangat kagum dgn KLIA. really.





so, sapa2 yg rasa nak propose tu, xpyh la buat ikan jaws lompat dgn cincin ka, cincin dlm kek ka or apa2 ka, bwk p klia n propose SURE WILL DO ONE :)

( ceceyh.. brani ah tulis kat sini sb tau org dhrpkn tu xkan baca. akikikiki )

baba..

if u ad terdial num i, u akan dengar lagu maneater by nelly furtado didendangkan. walaupun lagu ini berunsuran lucah x kena tempat, i pilih dis song actually for my parents, especialy my dad ( sb my mum dia dgr lg ni dia buat dek ja, my dad suka nely furtado. tapi jlo ttp dihatinya, miang org tua ni ).

so heres y..

1. make you work hard ( utk mncr rezeki, demi kesahjeteraan semua [[[[[: )

2. Make you spend hard ( ma sehh )

3. make you buy cars ( myvi ja pun, xkan nak bekira kot? )

4. make you cut cards ( ni xkan kot? insyallah x. )

5. when she talks, she talks like she can handle it ( pabila dikala disoal siasat untuk tingkah laku yg x brapa boleh dibanggakan )

6. when she asks for something boy she means it,even if you never ever seen it ( ini memang sikap jujur saya [: )

ALL IN ALL, I BERSYUKUR FOR EVERYTHING I HAVE . SGT99999999 DARAB INFINITY :)

:)

i sll tgk masa wedding org akan pasang lg, well.. mostly i tgk people akan letak lagu u raise me up (raise/raised?).. so ok la . FINE. but i think ive found mine too. tapi i dont noe either if i shud share with u readers or not. AKIKIKIKI (budget u guys nak folo) -sambung gelak- akikikiki.. bagi i pk dulu nohh :)

fly me to the moon - julie london

Fly me to the moon
And let me play among the stars
Let me see what spring is like
On Jupiter and Mars
In other words hold my hand
In other words darling kiss me

Fill my heart with song
And let me sing forevermore
You are all I long for
All I worship and adore
In other words please be true
In other words I love you

hmm

why did u get involved, noeing n crystal clearly tau.. theres gn b trouble? rive turned to pridge d, so now.. just bear the consequences. :(

that's amore - dean martin

In Napoli where love is king
When boy meets girl here's what they say

When the moon hits you eye like a big pizza pie
That's amore
When the world seems to shine like you've had too much wine
That's amore
Bells will ring ting-a-ling-a-ling, ting-a-ling-a-ling
And you'll sing "Vita bella"
Hearts will play tippy-tippy-tay, tippy-tippy-tay
Like a gay tarantella

When the stars make you drool just like a pasta fagiole
That's amore
When you dance down the street with a cloud at your feet
You're in love
When you walk down in a dream but you know you're not
Dreaming signore
Scuzza me, but you see, back in old Napoli
That's amore

dosa yang susah diampunkan

tuhan maha pengampun, everybody noes that. bila kita dah buat salah mmg kita akan mintak ampun dari-Nya dgn penuh bersungguh sungguh. rite? but, 1 ja He cant help us out with. DOSA KITA SESAMA MANUSIA.

u see, di sini.. bila kita dah menyakitkan hati org, kita mintak ampun kat tuhan pun x guna sbb u kena p mintak ampun kat org yg u dah sakiti. kalau u x mintak maaf dari dia, imagine how will u die? lain lah if u dh mintak ampun tapi dia hati batu gak, tapi at that point u jgn slhkan dia.. mayb u hurt them smp they hit rock bottom sb tu they cant forgive u. people ada reasons depa sendiri wen dey xnak ampun kan u . tapi still jahat la for me if dey dont. but u, u jgn pk org yg xnak ampunkan u. u cuba pk wat u did tu.

jgn la buat dgn org, x dibalas kat u, dia balas kat ur future, ur family ur close ones. dia bukan buat sebijik2. kalau kena balas anak u cacat for ur wrong doings towards people, u nak? every time u buat kat org , people will pray u ditimpa musibah (mintak simpang dimakbulkan). tu bru sorg, imagine if u hurt so many people, brapa doa org doakan u benda x baik? pk pk kan lah benda ni.

cermin diri tu, jgn asyik salahkan org. kalau u gado dgn sorang mayb slh dia, dua org..coincidently u guys gado.. but if more? then u r d trouble not others. it has always been like that. pk la pasal org lain sama sblm u buat anything, wat its like if u r in their shoes? u nak dimalukan for things u dont do or deserve? im sure u xnak.

n have u ever tot than bila u buat jahat dgn org, n u buat kenduri, lets say.. kenduri kawin.. sapa nak datang? x segan kat sanak saudara kalau suma kawan2 u boycot? or mayb u mmg dh plan x nak jemput? if dey x dtg, xpa.. wat if dey all cum n malukan u n destroy ur big day? i still find it not their fault but only disrespectful.

tu kalau kenduri kawin, wat if u die? n xd org dtg utk pray for u? xd org dtg utk angkat mayat u?

life is still a long way to go, its short.. but many lagi yg kita x go through. now bru student, nnt dh kerja? mcm2 lagi to come. we dont noe. now kita buat kat org, nnt kat kita? sapa yg buat kita xtau? its karma. EVERYTHING HAPPENS FOR A REASON, JUST DONT FIND PEOPLES KESALAHAN TO BLAME FOR UR WRONG DOINGS.

pk pk la of how many uve hurt by now, how banyak dosa u dh buat kat org n u nak kena p mintak ampun? u kalau buat dosa dgn diri u, yes.. ucan ask forgiveness from god. but not when u do it to hurt people for ur saiko - tic self satisfaction. please please please, fikir pasal benda ni. org ignore what u did, bukan sbb org takot.. org malas layan. org ada better things to do in life than argueing wit u. + others put self respect towards themselves n have n take care of their own dignity. unlike u, who only pk that wat u did is betol n ada org dok backup u. p/s : U R WRONG. THAT PERSON CALLS U SAIKO FROM TIME TO TIME. YES, THAT PERSON YANG U DOK MENGADU TU. ASK HER URSELF.

bye.

traveling

shud i do traveling yg relaxing or do shopping?

macam..

krabi or singapore?

torn.

ttb tringat kat natalie imbruglia..( how nak eja? ntah? )

pk pk pk !!

jap, pk final not bersuka ria.

FINAL FINAL FINAL !! :(

org..

sll jln jln smp cari pasal..

tapi, i..

jalan jalan balik mintak duit..

hm, tapi i rs, mintak duit is also salah satu cari pasal yang indirectly. so sama saja.. hmm

shit !

i finaly found his flaw :( ! hes not lefthanded. so now i understand y mcvalue meal although its super saving but still not complete. sbb x dpt mainan. hmm, i guess my meal isnt complete after all. hmm..

tapi xpa, saya YAKIN ( yakin? ) dengan bukan pendirian saya ttp pendirian org lain - cinta itu buta. (akikikiki)

bye!

i miss polka dot bt abdul rahim

tapi i pelik y ive never rindu princess gemok, louise or romeo as much as i miss her. pelik gila. kalau dia xdak kat rumah macam pelik. mana ntah dia p tapi satni ttb dia dok mai manja2 x kena tempat tetiba.

owh yea.. rumah i mmg macam mini jungle book. ada kucing, tebuan, eagle, biawak, burung kenari etc , baby ular, katak cantik, anjing, cicak, tikus tirus n tikus bellerina n macam macam lagi. ada yg mmg dibela, ada yg dtg ttb tanpa diundang. tapi pokok pokok tu suma xdla mcm hutan, cuma i pon x faham dari mana dtgnya mereka. mungkin sbb blkng umh i bukit kot?

xpala, happy hols to all ya animals :) enjoy ur stay

four ilmus

i did a little bit of self research and found that,i rasa i totaly agree with 4 ilmu yg u xkan menyesal smp mati.COMFIRM.

mambaca - when u can read, mmg sgt ssh utk u diperbodohkan n its like kalau x tau baca, mampuih lagi bagus.

menulis - kalau dh tau membaca xkan la xtau menulis kan? mcm pelik ja if xtau?

d basic of math - tambah tolak kali bahagi, kalau xtau ni.. i xtau nak ckp apa.mmg diperlukan

memandu - kalau blajar bawak kreta mmg comfirm useful

4 4 ilmu ni mmg sgt berguna sb u akan aply benda ni seumur hidup. kalau u xtau, ur life is soo much like hidup segan mati xmau. SERIUS. tolonglah xtau keempat empat ilmu ni. sangat sangat berguna in our daily lives :)

on top of the world - PCD

lama x update, sb internet has gone haywire, bz tido.. tekanan jiwa raga dgn dis particular someone.n etc, so.. um, owh! SHEENA.. ok its not going to b a bagra dance, kita menari disko disko ok?tapi mungkinkah tokba akan sihat sebab tekejut?hmm, nnt pk.. janji enjoy! m rely loking forward dor this weekend ( HANA MIA! JUMJUM! )

i got into thinking hari tu, org bila break akan cakap, halal makan n minum.. so i ada 1 idea. nnt bila dah rasa mcm ada aura aura u nak break w that special someone, hutang duit dia banyak2.. p joli n bfoya poya puas puas, then! jgn byr, tungu break n mintak halal. haa.. pandai x? kikiki..

owh! one more thing, ni pasal cupcake n cake. i xtau la i ni old peshen ka pa kan, tapi i always prefer cake dari cupcake. sbb kan, d joy of potong cake is soooooo clasic n memorable, but if u do cupcake, its just a blow. n susah nak cary towards that someone. of course its cantik, n obvi kids love it! but, i rasa its just a trend. but cake, mcm just stay there dari dulu smp now n stil mcm puas hati. FOR ME LA. hmm

ni recently noticed, that.. clothes i, kalau gila suka baju tu, it will end up.. tebakar sb srika panas sgt, koyak or hilang. it can never stay long with me. I DONT KNOW Y. but it has always been like that n i baru sedar. so from now on, i xmau ada fav clothes dh.

N I PUNYA PROGRAM JAGA PAHALA DIBANTUT DAN DI POSPON SEBAB RECENT SOMETING THAT HAPPENED

LYSSA W. , I PUN HAVE D SAME Q PASAL D BODY ODOUR.